Myra Hurtado

There are some moments we spend years hoping for—and then, when they finally arrive, they undo us a little. In May, my baby girl graduated from high school. And in this same season, my middle daughter graduated from nursing school, became engaged, and just recently moved out. My heart is bursting with pride. I am grateful, excited, and in awe of the people they have become. I watched them step toward their futures and felt the kind of joy that is almost too big for the body to hold. And I was...

If rules alone worked, parenting would be easy. But many parents discover—especially in hard moments—that enforcing rules without connection often leads to power struggles, shutdown, or escalation. From a trauma-informed and nervous-system perspective, this makes complete sense. Because children don’t learn best when they feel threatened.They learn when they feel safe . Why Relationship Matters More Than Rules Rules help guide behavior, but relationship shapes regulation . A child’s ability...

Many of the struggles people experience in adult relationships don’t begin in adulthood. They begin much earlier—before language, before memory, before conscious choice. They begin in the nervous system. Attachment Is Learned in the Body First Our earliest relationships teach our nervous systems what to expect from connection. Long before we can think or speak, our bodies are learning: Is closeness safe? Will my needs be noticed and responded to? Do I have to work for love—or withdraw to...